Monday, 13 February 2012

'URI GELLER AND THE TRIO OF EFFERVESCENT RELATIVES'


In my life I have experienced some pretty exciting things; from telepathically mending Big Ben after it stopped ticking, to bending President Clinton's soup spoon at his inauguration dinner. But today I am super-excited, and there are two reasons for the aforementioned excitement within me:

1) Tonight a new television show I have been developing for Albanian television begins.

2) My parents and Grandmother have flown over from Israel to support me..... and they are here in the studio!

This is the most wonderful family portrait, and am so pleased I can share it with you.
Here you can see my Mother and Father on the right of the picture and my Grandmother to the left. I know what you must be thinking, now that you have this information; "Uri, how can this be, they look even younger than you!".

Well, the answer is so unbelievable that with every passing sentence you will find it totally believable.

When I first discovered my paranormal talents I was 11 years old, and hungry to learn more about the unspoken powers of psychic ability. So, I began mind-control experiments on my family without neither their knowledge or their consent. One of the very few successful experiments occurred in 1957, when I hypnotised their genes and stopped them aging from that day forward. And as you see, the results speak for themselves.

"Why didn't you perform the experiment on yourself at the same time, Uri?" I hear you ask.

Well, if you have ever seen the Jeff Goldblum documentary 'The Fly' you will understand why this could never, has never, and will never be an option.


Until the next time.... love, peace and positive energy,

-Uri